Monday, December 8, 2008


I just wanted to share a testimony of how God spoke to me when I was confused and being stubborn. This is something I really needed to hear. I have alot of things I feel like NEED to happen. Alot of things that NEED to be done a certain way. When they don't I get really flustered and overwhelmed. I am not as good at being calm about it when I am sick.

I got this really big thump on the head from God that I don't NEED to do my work in peoples lives but I NEED to let Him do His work. Then I would be alot less flustered because then everything wouldn't be up to me. Life is not really people becoming what I think God wants them to be. It's about me hearing from God for my life. If I would spend more time encouraging the accomplishments I see rather than the things I wish people could be(including myself) I am sure it would be more pleasing to God. Everyone gets more done with encouragment than with nagging. I beleive His word says spur each other to good works.

I want to become a wife that nags less and encourages more. I want to be the wife that notices the little things my husband does everyday to be the man God is asking. I want to be the mother that spurs my children to good works. This is my prayer to get off my agenda and onto God's.


Monday, November 24, 2008


I have been given a challenge and I want to pass it on to others. This time of year when we are just covered in commercials with Thanksgiving sales and turkeys, I am afraid we have forgotten to be thankful. I am talking about the act of being thankful, to actually act it out not just sit together at a table and eat food or make plans for another year with the family. I am having a year that I see God moving in my heart and life to remind me "look around Laura at all I provided in friends, family, food, and love." I have fallen short to be thankful, not just to God, but to actually say these words to others so they will know what they mean to me.

There are so many people that pour there lives out for Christ and refuse to be thanked, but I believe we can thank them on God's behalf. We need to thank them for their surrender to His will. We can all think of how someones surrendered life has changed or impacted ours in some way.

I am going to give a minimum of 30 minutes to actively being thankful this Thanksgiving. I am going to be specific with at least one person about what am thankful for in how they impact my life. I am also going to start a tradition in my family of thankfulness this year. This was the challenge I was given, I believe in passing on a good challenge. Maybe this will be a truly thankful Thanksgiving :)


Saturday, August 16, 2008


This is something that has been really pressing on my heart for some time now. Can I or anyone for that matter really make a difference in someone elses life without a relationship?

I guess the answer is yes and no. I hate and love hard questions, questions that us make think. Questions that drive us to our knees in prayer, for ourselves and others.

The yes, I think is someone I have never met could do something heroic or very giving, or sacrificial and that may change the course of my life forever IF I hear about it. It could also change my life if it effects my life in some way even if I have never met them. Therefore I can with my choices change lives without even knowing that person.

The no I believe is someone cannot make lasting change in anyone including their own personal lives without relationship. That relationship I believe is with Christ and it isn't how much we know about him or have read, even in our bible or have heard from a friend. I believe it's how much what we read, and know and have heard from a friend caused real changes in our life.

I want to be changed by my relationship with Jesus! I want to cause changes around me because of my relationship with Jesus! I am so very thankful for a God who loved me so much that he changed my life forever and he continues to work in me every single day!


Monday, July 28, 2008

Grace Makes Life Not Fair

What? Surely I don't mean that, but I do. This has been echoing in my head for a couple of weeks now. I have a paper route and I often listen to my favorite music while delivering in the middle of the night. Most times, I have it on and it serves merely as background music to disrupt the monotony of driving my route, sometimes it is more than that. Recently as I was listening, I heard the lyrics "but the beauty of grace is, it makes life not fair." I was kind of awestruck at first--"did I really hear that right?" Then, as the meaning of those words sank in, I was again awestruck, but because of the truth disclosed in that phrase.

God's grace is not an easy thing for us to grasp. An almighty, omnipotent, omniscient, infinite God, who created the universe, also sent His son to die a sinner's death for me. This is a concept that is far beyond the reaches of my mind, and I have relinquished all efforts to understand it. You may be wondering, "how does grace make life not fair?" It's kind of like this, through the death of Jesus you can have eternal life with the God that created the universe, and all you have to do is say yes to Jesus--He paid your sin debt. Is that fair? The answer of course is no, we are free to accept something that we have neither earned, nor deserve. Isn't that what fair is, getting what you deserve?

There is more to come on grace, but for now, I am going to leave this here, I don't want what I deserve. I want to remain wrapped in the grace that was freely given by God to all who call on and accept the salvation that comes only through the redeeming death of Christ's crucifixion.


BTW, the song is "Be My Escape" on the Mmhmm album by Relient K


Saturday, July 26, 2008

Who I want to be

There are only a few people we meet in life that truly change us forever. They change our walk with Christ for the better and make us want more of Jesus. They humble us without accusing us of anything. I have met someone like this and it makes me want to be that person to other people.

I want to make Jesus my only pursuit and I want it to be obvious in my words and my home. I want it to be obvious in what say and what I don't say. I want it to be obvious in what I hold dear and what I let go of in life.

I have recently been so blessed it brought tears to my eyes. It showed God's love in action in many people and I believe it will have an impact on eternity. It urged me to good works for Christ, it caused me to be more passionate for Jesus. It amazed me. I truly stood in awe of a awesome God.

I know few people that let Christ work through them to His fullest potential! I am not one them. But I know one and I want to be one with all of my heart. I pray God will use my life. I pray I live a surrendered life. I pray I will mean it.


Wednesday, July 16, 2008

What is Truly Awesome?

Lately my family and I have been in what you might call a slump. It feels kind of like we are all standing around looking for God, wondering where He is. It is through this time that I have come to a stunning realization. The thing that we long to have, the thing that compels us forward and keeps us going is something that we have long believed to be found in the church (read as church-building.) This could not be further from the truth.

We had been involved in a church plant several years ago that was a truly awesome experience, and through it we learned more than most church-goers might learn in several decades of attending church. I do not say this to brag or to make more of us than we are, just to illustrate the point that God was there--and was really making a difference in people's lives. The plant lasted for about five years when it ended in miserable failure. Truths were revealed that cut deeply, and we were left standing around confused, frustrated, angry, and asking God "How did this happen?" The sting of this has haunted us for many years, and has been a large factor in our involvement in church and how close we will let people get to us.

What we have learned from all of this is that we have expectations, and that we put those expectations off on God and think that He is in some way obligated to fulfill them. Reality check folks, God does His thing and has no obligations of the sort to maintain for us. The first thing that we needed to admit is that we really thought that God let us down. He didn't. Job lost way more than we did when God allowed Satan to put the screws to him, and he never felt that God owed him anything. We also needed to realize that although we met in a church building, it was really, truly, only God working in the lives of the people there that compelled us forward and gave us the strength to carry on. We didn't do anything special there, we were just real people with real problems, seeking after and serving a real God. It says in the Psalms that "our God is in Heaven and He does as He pleases." It is not for us to understand God or even try to, (I don't want to have a God that I can understand.) What we do need to understand is that God is in His people, and living out our lives in service to Him and helping strengthen His people, is what the "church" should be doing.

I have said all of this to say that I have seen a miserable failure become the de facto standard that I have been measuring all other churches against, and that is exactly what I need to be doing. It was in this miserable failure that I have seen the truest manifestation of God in a body of believers, ever, period. Despite the hand of man doing it's best to mess it up, God has shown me what it is that I need to be doing. That is the answer to the question "what is truly awesome?" Seeing God take something that I have labeled as a failure and showing me the success in it is truly awesome. That is the God that I serve, one that can make awesome out of utter disaster.


Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Have we hit a snag?!?

Lately it seems we want so badly to get on track financialy and we have the tools but we are not applying them. We are just using the "head in the sand technique". I don't even want to know how bad it is. This is showing a lack of faith in God's ability to work in our life.

I am sure this is a snag and a valley! I know this will pass not because we are doing nothing but because we will start doing what God has called us to do. It is time to stop dwelling on the past and start putting energy into what changes can be made and make them.

It is so true we spend alot of time trying to get forgiven for something that the Lord has forgiven long ago and it keeps us stuck. We need to stay current. We need to keep our joy and be obedient to Christ in all things, through His strength.

I am so thankful for a savior that is faithful in all things, and through all things. I am grateful for loving family and friends in Christ who are praying us through and by God's leading have helped us through when we were in trouble. Please continue to pray with us through this struggle in our life, as we want victory.

In Christ,

Thursday, May 29, 2008

What do you say about Christ?

I was reading today and it smacked me in the face that we tell people who Christ is everyday. I think we think we do this with our mouths but I have to very respectfully disagree. People are looking at everything that comes out of our lives in our actions. When we say we know Christ.

I will go further and say if our life is unloving and judgemental or even a life with rules to follow to get to heaven. People will not be drawn to Christ! They are already failing now at life with those things in it. If we could work our way to heaven then Christ would have had nothing to die for! As Christians we need to live like we know Christ is the only way to heaven. We need make sure all the things we do are not to get points in heaven but they are driven by God. He loves us all the way, all the time and all the same.

I have been continually challenged to live this way. I am convinced this will draw people to Christ. This represents Christ in us not religion at work. People want the real thing. I have found the painful truth is I like to do it my way and I like things done fast. This walk with Christ is a process and it is done His way. The biggest reason I believe we should want to live with Christ in us, without religion is religion leads people astray and Christ draws people to the truth.

Friday, May 23, 2008

In Awe of God's Provision

I find myself overwhelmed when I consider how God has provided for me. He has provided for me in many ways, and I am thankful for them all, but today I am truly in awe of the wife that He has given me. A spouse is someone that is so easily taken for granted, much to the shame of us all. I have been blessed with a woman that has seen me through some of the darkest hours of my life, but has been with me in triumph as well. She fills in my blank spots in more ways than I could communicate to anyone.

Tonight we are going to a wedding. One of the young men that was in my youth group many years ago is getting married to the woman that God has picked for him. It absolutely blows me away when I think about how God brings a man and a woman together like two puzzle pieces that fit together exactly to complete a masterpiece that only God could create. I pray that my friend will never forget the gift that is being given to him today by God, and that their marriage will grow stronger every day, through the hard times and the easy times, I know that mine has.

I thank you God for my wife, and all that she brings to my life. I pray that you will bless the marriage of our friend, as you have blessed ours.


Thursday, May 15, 2008

Who doesn't need grace?

I have been in many conversations lately and I keep being reminded that I don't know a single person who doesn't need grace. I think sometimes we forget when we are complaining or when we are unhappy with something that all of us are in need of grace. Even bigger than our need is that without Christ we would not have grace in our own life. Grace is truly amazing. When we really take time to really soak it in and dwell on it.

I sometimes feel entitled to justice and restoration. I know I can offer grace because Christ gave it to me and the rest is in His hands.

Thank you Jesus for your grace at work everyday in my life!

Friday, May 9, 2008

I can't get no satisfaction

This title is a bit of a misnomer as it relates to what I am feeling lately, but it does accurately depict the feelings that have been rattling around inside me for some time.

I have recently started a second job in an effort to improve our financial situation here at home. It has been a struggle to get over the hump of it and finally settle into the thankfulness to God for providing this opportunity to me. You see, it was only after I had begun this job that I realized how truly unsatisfied I had been with my performance as the family's "provider." I have worked at the same place for ten and a half years and have convinced myself that my income there is enough-despite the fact that the evidence lay before me in unopened envelopes, blatantly telling me otherwise. I had finally succeeded in lying to myself enough, and believed that everything was cool, much to my chagrin.

Over the past week, through half-opened eyelids, and hours of sleep dwindling to what feels like near-nothing, I have realized the satisfaction of providing for my family, a feeling that I had cheapened and cheapened over the years until I finally succumbed to the shell of satisfaction I had created in my mind. I praise God today for providing this opportunity to me; for showing me what real satisfaction feels like, and for giving me the strength to take on this load. It is only through His strength that I am able to achieve this awesome feeling. There is a long road ahead of me, but I know that God has given me this opportunity, and He will see me through.


Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Tips and To Do Lists

I have been realizing lately because of this thing called facebook that all people go through shared struggles and the answers to those struggles are the same. A tip from a friend or well organized to do list is great for so long but we all realize fast we are just getting by. We are not growing closer to Christ and in a moment anything can derail even the best planned list.

My own life this past year has thrown more curve balls than I could plan for. I think with things that are not planned for we need to draw closer to the God that knows everything not keep trying to scratch out and revise our to do list. I find it harder to make time for my relationship with Jesus in the busy confusing times of life and then life get busier and more confusing. I am beginning to think there is a connection between the two.

The point would be pursue with all your heart a authentic relationship with Jesus and throw away the to do lists. They will only bog you down and take you away from the one who is never surprised by the things that come up in life.